


and the time for healing

by Sablehaven



Category: The Librarians (TV 2014)
Genre: Episode: s02e08 And the Point of Salvation, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2017-06-24
Packaged: 2018-11-18 09:39:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11288619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sablehaven/pseuds/Sablehaven
Summary: Anon prompted me: If you're still accepting prompts, could you maybe write something where Cassandra finds out Ezekiel remembers the video game because she reads his mind?I did, and it definitely took on a life of it's own. I'm very proud of this and hope everyone likes it :)





	and the time for healing

Ezekiel was having a Bad Day. All of his days were divided like this now, into good days or Bad Days. For the most part everything had been okay, just some invasive thoughts creeping in now and then. But today? Today was bad. Ezekiel couldn't even be sure what triggered him this time.

 

Maybe the crowd, pushing and shoving at him from last mission? Maybe Jake, muttering _'what kind of thief.._ ' when Ezekiel broke one of his picks? Maybe it was Eve, running into danger as if she had no regard for her own life?

 

No matter what caused it, he was there again. With that goddamn loop playing over in his head, over and over again like a broken record. He was just glad everyone was out. He'd watched them die hundreds of times. Sometimes cleanly, sometimes buried in so many Rage People that he could only hear, not see. Sometimes it was brutal, and when it started over yet again he was left scrubbing at his arms trying to remove blood that wasn't actually there.

 

Ezekiel wasn't sure when he ended up on the floor, arms around his knees and head buried. He'd only meant to get a cup of tea from the kitchen. The kettle kept beeping at him, over and over again and every single goddamn time it brought him circling back to the security door with it's illogical lock that he. Just. Kept. Failing.

 

Ezekiel forced himself to breath through the ringing echo of 'some master thief!' running relentlessly through his head. The breath turned into a sob before he could suppress it.

 

_'Some master thief!' 'Invalided entry code activated. 'They're coming!' 'Some master thief!' 'Invalided entry code activated.' 'Some master thief!' 'This isn't real. There are no consequences. This isn't real. There are no consequences' 'Ezekiel Jones does not lose to a gate!'_

 

_'I can't watch you die anymore!'_

 

_'JONES!'_

 

He barely heard the soft gasp behind him, noticing just enough to feel the touch of Cassandra in his mind. Oh god.

 

"Ezekiel..?" He shuddered, forcing his stiff joints to unlock so he could get out. Out of the kitchen, out the conversation. Preferably out of his own head.

 

"Ezekiel.. are you okay?" The question was so obviously rhetorical that Ezekiel scoffed before realizing how bloody close she was. He gave up trying to move when she sat down next to him on the floor. Her shoulder pressed against his and he flinched against his will.

 

"We thought you didn't remember... why did you lie about it? You didn't need to go through this alone."

 

Ezekiel too a deep breath and thought about exactly how he could explain this, how he could make her understand.

 

"I couldn't be that person Cassandra. The way you all talked about me, about how I acted in the game. Jake said that I 'finally turned into a halfway decent person.' Cassandra.. if I admitted that I remembered, you would have all expected me to be that person. But that? That traumatized, anxiety ridden mess? That isn't me, and I just wanted to put it behind me as fast as I could."

 

Ezekiel clenched his fists at his side to keep from wrapping his arms around himself again, studiously not looking at Cassandra. She was quiet, the kind of quiet that only comes from someone who doesn't know if there is anything to say.

 

"I'm so sorry Ezekiel. That, that was wrong. We were wrong. I-I'm sorry we made you hide this." Ezekiel jolted, finally looking at her. She stared straight ahead, hands clenched in her lap and eyes shining.

 

Ezekiel didn't know how to respond, how to react. People did not apologize to Ezekiel Jones. It just didn't happen.

 

"The others need to know Ezekiel. It isn't right that you're going through this on your own, and they'll understand! Really, you know they will."

 

Ezekiel's first instinct was to just bolt. Get out of there and deal with it when he wasn't still shaking. He bit back that urge and let himself actually think about it. Flynn, Eve, Jake, even Jenkins were all getting better. More kind, less quick to judge. Maybe he could do this.

 

"Okay." The word felt like relief and pure terror at the same time. Was he doing this? Was he really doing this?

 

Cassandra grinned at him, looking so utterly proud that he knew it was the right decision. "Tomorrow?" Ezekiel nodded, vision almost blurry as she yanked him to his feet.

 

"Come on. Let's go get some pastries in Paris."


End file.
